Why Your Frequency Matters More Than Your To-Do List

Why Your Frequency Matters More Than Your To-Do List

Hello. Hello everyone. My name is Bettina and I'm the host of In The Rising Podcast. This is the platform where I talk about just getting tired of being on the train of shame and blame. You know when that train just keeps getting longer and longer, and so much of your life is just negative and you're not living the life you really wanna live, and you are noticing that what you had in your goals intended is not happening.

If you want more joy, more life and strategies and techniques and tactics to improve your life, So that way when it's time for us to move on to the next phase, you're like, I did everything I could. Well then this is the podcast for you. I love to talk about what makes us tick. So I am not a psychologist or counselor, psychiatrist, anything.

I am a student of life and a physical therapist, and I spent several years talking with patients going through cancer, and there's something about. That word, there's something about facing the possibility of the end of your life that really opens your eyes to what is in front of you, and when you're a person working with clients that are going through this.

You can't help but be changed. You can't help but be affected. And so that's where this podcast stemmed from, those sort of conversations with these phenomenal people evaluating their self, their life, and really fighting for their life, regardless of length of life, but fighting for quality, fighting for meaning and clarity.

So I wanted to talk about this book I came across, my best friend gave it to me. Uh, she had someone that really loved this book and she ordered it on Amazon and had it delivered to my house. And so I really wanted to talk about it today because it really changed how my week was going, and it really changed my perspective.

So what book is this? So the book is called 365 Ways to Raise Your Frequency by Melissa Alvarez. And it's basically tools to raise your spiritual energy, get your balance, purpose, and joy back in life, which is exactly what's up my sleeve. But have you ever felt. Just like there's this, this negative cloud over you.

And no matter what you do, there just seems to be more negative cloud over you, and it doesn't seem like you have any energy, like everything's negative. You have very little energy to work out, very little energy to cook something healthy, very little energy to be actively engaged with the people around you.

Well, I have been in that place many times, and even though overall I feel I've made many gains, you know, through some of these conversations I've had with my clients and just reading a little bit more and going through my own processes, there are just sometimes when I'm, I can tell I just don't have all the, the energy there.

I feel like I'm having trouble staying motivated to stay on task. Maintaining my daily discipline to remain on track with my goals, and it's just staying difficult. So sometimes what's the problem may be our own frequency. You know, there's a lot of studies about whether or not this is all a woowoo from, you know, new age, what have not, and other times.

It can really show that even in some of our texts that we revere more, there are basically innuendos and parables that lead to how we think leads to actions. So if we think negative, we have more negative in our life, and if we think positive, we are more positive in our life. So how can we raise our intention?

And so this book by Melissa Alvarez has 365 ways to do it, but I wanted to just. Toned down to five because I love to talk about self-love and staying motivated for self-love and following. Then, self-care, setting boundaries between you and other people. Acknowledging how your own behavior is important, putting self-control into your own life, as well as love and joy.

How do we do that? So what I really liked about Melissa is she talks about the emotion of love being the greatest way you can control your energy and love. You know, when we're, when we're angry with someone, we can kind of, have you ever stopped yourself and you're like, I'm so angry, and you're just in that mode, but you look at that person and yes, you're still very angry, but there's just this love and affection.

For that person that just kind of kind of stops you. Like there's a little love hand on your chest and it's like, just calm down. You know, it's not that bad. Have you ever looked at that with your child, for example, where you're just upset and then you're like, you know what? I just gotta let this go. So that's the same thing when you're looking at yourself in the mirror.

You know, you're upset with what you've done or decisions from the past, or your past is sneaking up. You also have to put that little love hand on yourself, like you know what it's gonna be okay. And give yourself some compassion. So one of the ways, I'm gonna talk about five, but n way number one is to raise your frequency to get back in alignment with what your goals are, whether they're smart goals, career goals, relationship goals is clarity of purpose.

And I think the word clarity is one of my favorite in the whole language, English language, but just to be very clear, so not muddy. There's no dirt in that water. It's just crystal clear what your purpose is. That can be anything. It can be your crystal clear that you are a parent and you are going to do the best parenting job you can do.

Not you compared to what someone else is posting online, but you be clear with what your intentions are. So in order to be clear with what they are, it always helps to know what they are in the first place. And so write them down, post them up. You know, I've, I've had some people say, you know, that stuff doesn't work.

Writing stuff doesn't work, you know, but there is. A lot of research also that points out when you write things down, it has an increased importance in your brain because you wrote it down, there was an action that every single word, every single letter had to go through a mental process in order for you to write it down.

And that's why some people even recommend writing it over, putting it on a computer and printing it out. There is a little more value to the time, there's more value to those words. So when you've written out those goals, you, your body says these are more important. There was time to them, there was value, and we have to stay to them.

And it's similar to a ship following, you know, the North Star. Hmm. And, you know, there's a, there's a horrible weather system out there and they make it. That star is still there. When the weather clears up the, the north star, their, their guiding light is still there and it will still keep them on track even if they go off track because of the weather storm.

You know what? They're happy they made it through the weather storm that they're not underneath water but above. And that's how we can be too when we are clear on our purpose, even if we are swept side to side in the storms of life. Sometimes the storms of life that we created ourselves, we can still be clear on our purpose.

And when you're that clear and you just keep coming back, it's the same like a, a habit for your body. Having that purpose is just so embedded in your being that that itself will raise your frequency and raise your intention in life. Number two is take a moment for yourself. This one was hard for me.

Last week. I did an exercise with someone and you know, they're saying, what, what, what is going on with you, Bettina? And I said, I just feel like my brain is always spinning and my brain is going, going, going, going, and I can tell that my brain is just on fast. There are things that I wanna do that require me to slow down and it just, it doesn't seem like my brain can follow what I would want it to do.

And a lot of this involved with things that I grew up, that achievement was such a big, big goal like achievement. Was it? But you always have something more to achieve, right? Like when are you. When is enough enough? Like how many degrees in certifications do you really need? And for some of us, it's quite a bit, but how many do you really need to be you?

How many do you really need to have clarity in your purpose? And then what I discovered is I felt overwhelmed. I felt overwhelmed with everything, and I just needed to learn to calm myself down, and I had to change my perspective. So sometimes the storms of life are with all sorts of things happening.

You know, when, when it's just like it, it just keeps coming hit after hit. But sometimes the storms of life are our own emotions. It's not just the action or whatever event is happening, but have you ever felt the way that your own emotion. That you have so many emotions and so many deep emotions, and usually they're so deep negative emotions that you cannot even find your own North star.

So calming yourself down and making a point not to distract yourself, not, you know, I'm just going to. Do this activity or sit down and do some yoga, but my brain's still going to actually put your brain out of something, not numb it, but actually come. Taking that moment for yourself is huge, and that moment may take 10 minutes.

That moment may take 15. That moment may take in half an hour, but your mental and emotional and spiritual person, you're, that part of you really can use it. Melissa also talks about getting out of your own way. And I love this because no one is in my way more than myself. And you know, for number three, when we're on the go, go, go, we have our agendas, we have our errands, we have our plans, we just wanna schedule everything.

Everything has its place. Everything has this little Tetris, you know, life is this Tetris thing for us. We wanna have everything right where it is. We have our goals for doing X, Y, and Z at a, B, and C time. But when things don't fit into our little Tetris mold, sometimes we have to just stop. You know, if we're looking for something and we're turning those pieces in many different ways, and it's just not fitting into that little hole so we can go on to the next thing.

It is okay for us to recognize and realize that sometimes the solution will appear on its own. It may not be that next block that comes down. It may not be the next five blocks that comes down, but it will, it will come down. The world hasn't ended because the solution wasn't able to present itself in five minutes, or we weren't able to manufacture solution.

Sometimes waiting for an answer is really what we need to do. And Melissa, the author of this book, has this analogy, which totally resonates with me and it may resonate with you also, but she talks about when, when you need to just let a dish simmer when you're cooking, you need to let it simmer on low heat.

Not adding more spices, stirring, tasting, and ruining the dish with all this extra work. Just let the dish simmer. And I've been a person that I've really been struggling to learn to cook on low heat. I have been cooking on high cuz I gotta get things done, I gotta get a, and you know, the food really tasted the same, which was burnt, but you have such a great learning opportunity.

By just slowing the down and, and letting it cook slowly. And it doesn't just pertain to dishes that we eat. It can also be with situations in life. And that was a huge learning lesson for me and I, I really, I really thought that was important. I love that analogy. So number four is that you should take balance.

Take balance. You should take Alan action when you're in balance. So when you have a lot of negativity around you, sometimes it's outside of you. You know, people around you are negative or you know an overall situation is negative, sometimes it's inside of you where you are feeling that shame and blame.

Sometimes it's in both places. You're surrounded by it. It's oozing out of you and it's oozing in you. But when you're in those kind of places, it's not really wise to make decisions. You need to get some balance in your life, and that's where things like this book may come in handy. I'm gonna go ahead and post it with the description, but there are other times when you just recognizing.

That you're in a place where you're not in balance. You know, there's, there's no seesaw of that. You're all negative. What things, what strategies, including today's, can you get to the center of that teeter-totter? How can you get to that place before you make a decision? And it's hard to get to that place when you're in such a, such a fulfilled surrounding place of negativity.

But if you're realizing you're not in balance in the first place, That might be the first thing. And so number five is a little goes a long way. You know, we don't need to be on the top of our game right away. We don't need to understand something and be good at it. Yesterday when we've learned it today, some things take time.

And the more we want it to be just now. Now yesterday, da da, da. We're taking away from the process of learning. We're actually taking away from our own brain's way of processing, learning, and growing. So, This really pulled together with a book I had talked about an episode or two ago where it's about atomic habits by James Clear, where he says, every day, if you can improve just 1%.

Well, 10 days later it's 10% and it continues on at some point. Not with addition, but exponentially. So nothing happens on accident. But if you do 1% or a little bit, Every single day, suddenly you see a huge change. Suddenly you see, um, the relationship is much deeper and better, and you never thought about all the little things that you did and they did to make that relationship flow and improve.

One day you look around and you're retired and you have the house of your dreams and the pool of your dreams. But how did that happen from someone who was just dreaming about it when they were 17 or 16? 1%, those little changes every single day add up. And so a little can make a long way, a little bit of just saying thank you to someone.

A little bit of kindness, a little bit of time for yourself. A little nap, really. My, my naps aren't that little, sometimes they're a little bit longer, but having those things together can really help raise your frequency. So number one. I talked about clarity of purpose, being aware of your goals. Number two, taking a moment for yourself, taking that time out.

Number three, getting out of your own way. Number four, take action when you're imbalance, not when you're off balance. And number five is knowing that a little bit can go a very long way. So I hope you enjoyed this podcast today. I really think this is a phenomenal book, uh, 365 Ways to Raise Your Frequency by Melissa Alvarez and.

I really appreciate your time. So all of our minutes, not just the logos a long way, but all of our minutes count. All of our minutes are important and thank you for sharing yours with me today. If this is the sort of topic you appreciate and like go ahead and hit the subscribe button and I would really appreciate a review because reviews are the currency on the internet nowadays.

So thank you so much. I will see you guys next Tuesday and then let's keep building one another up!