The Power of Positivity: How a Positive Mindset Can Improve Your Confidence and Self-Esteem

 The Power of Positivity: How a Positive Mindset Can Improve Your Confidence and Self-Esteem 

Hello again and welcome to the In The Rising Podcast. This is the show from which I talked to you about living a life without the captivity of guilt and regret. So that you use your self-worth to live an empowered, independent, free, awesome. Fantastic. Full of joy life, because that's what this should be all about.

My name is Bettina, and I will start off by saying, what I always start off with saying is that I am not a licensed counselor, psychologist, or psychiatrist, but I am a student of life, a healthcare professional who loves to research and I am a person with a soul trying to pay it forward to so many people that have helped me as well.

So if this topic and similar topics are of interest to you, go ahead and click the subscribe so that you get an automatic update when these new podcasts arrive every Tuesday. So this is episode 14 and this one is looking a little bit more. How self-confidence and self-esteem relate, and how are they, how are they linked together, and is it possible to have one and not the other?

And do they do they feed into one another? So me and my research, but I look this up and the word confident comes from the Latin word feder, which probably is pronounced differently, but I don't speak Latin. What Feder means is to trust. So self-confidence is about trusting yourself in your situation, trusting yourself with your thought process, just trusting yourself in who you are.

So isn't it amazing then that those with low self-confidence, or if you're having a moment where you don't have a lot of self-confidence, it's because you don't trust yourself and you're the one person with whom you have total like insider knowledge on, you know, you don't have to worry about, well, what, what are they thinking?

You know what you're thinking. You don't have to worry about whether or not you're gonna make yourself dinner or. You know, if you're gonna make your dinner or not. And if you don't, you ha you know you're gonna do something about it. Like, you know yourself, you, you know you better than anyone else. And I believe a lot of us have low self-confidence at times because we don't know us better than anyone else.

We don't know ourselves at all. The lack of self-confidence is the lack in the one true person who we're the closest to. But we usually refer to confidence in terms of how adequately we deal with the outside world, not really the internal thing, which is what it sounds like, you know, to trust yourself.

But how are we able to go after opportunities? How do we deal with things that don't go our way? Do we take respons? For the good and the bad. You know, sometimes you have a really great idea and you're afraid to stand up that this was your idea, or stand up to follow through on your good idea to stand up, period and give a presentation or just to go after your dreams.

There's, there's no confidence, there's no trust in your own ability to complete. You don't fail forward, you're just failing backwards because you're not doing it. So there's this neat thing is that when we complete tasks that we weren't so sure about, we actually can boost our self-confidence. And when we boost our self-confidence, yes, that does lead to something else.

It leads to increased self. And I like the way the psychiatrist, Dr. Neil Burton said it. He's a, in the absence of confidence, courage takes over. I just, I think I'm gonna write that down and post it somewhere. Sometimes I don't feel very confident, but I, I pull out, or sometimes I pull very hard and, and, and sometimes there's not a lot of courage, but I pull out whatever courage I have to look confident.

I had a professor in school that said, when you tell your client or your patient, you know, I'm a physical therapist, but he said, when you tell them that you don't know, say it confidently say, I don't know, but I will look up that answer because you don't want to lose their confidence in you that, that you know, some things you don't know, but say it confidently.

I'll never forget that. Say, be confident in your confusion and that helps build up your esteem and that helps up build your esteem in front of the other person. But having the courage to say, I don't know, in front of someone that's looking at you for answers and probably had a big copay, that that takes a little bit like, I don't know.

I'll look it up. I'll ask someone, I'll consult, but I, I don't know. I don't know. And when I read that, you know, that courage takes over. I thought about the kit. Now you can see on Pinterest, so you've probably seen it on Facebook where there's a little kitten looking in the mirror and in the mirror reflecting back as this lion.

So clearly one is domestic domesticated and the other is not. But what the point of that picture is, you may feel like a kitten. You may be the little kitten, but inside every single one of us is this king of the jungle. Is this king of the Serengeti that we kinda look at lions, in the, in our reflection in the mirror sometimes the way we look at a lion in the zoo, like, wow, that's big and frightening and I'm glad I'm over here.

And if you ever have an opportunity to, to hear what comes out of a lion, it's. You know, there's, there's no doubt in that lion, he's a lion. You know, there's no question about where he stands in the midst of everything. And I love that because that lion is in each one of us. We just have to pull, pull that lion out and, and I looked up self-esteem.

Esteem also. Comes from Latin, and I'm not even gonna be able to pronounce this correctly, but it's estim, which means to appraise value rate, way, estimate. So the self-esteem is basically like our cognitive, and our emotional appraisal of our own self-worth. So if you have some self. You know, cognitively and emotionally that you have some value, regardless of if you failed a test, regardless, if you may have had, you know, flipped your car, regardless of, of, you know, a not positive relationship experience, regardless of a financial faux pa or several financial faux pause, you know that you're just a human being living this life to the full.

And the UPS cannot be up by definition without a down to compare it to. That's that self-esteem. So courage, confidence, lead to increased esteem, but that is unfortunately not always the case, and this is the time when we can think often. Celebrities people who have everything we think you need to feel confident and loved, and these people drown themselves in alcohol, drugs, anything to not be aware of their own life.

And it looks beautiful to everyone else, but they're falling. So how can we then increase our confidence and how can we, I guess, just in general increase our courage? I have three, three things. There's many more, but I like these three. I like to keep it simple. So my favorite is number one, learn to say no.

It's one of my absolute favorites, and it was one thing that I hat. I hates it. I always think about Lord of the Rings and call 'em, I hates it, or it's we hates it. But either way hates hate, hate, hate the word no. But now I love it. Sometimes you just don't wanna go to that dinner or you don't wanna be the parent making the cupcakes for the entire class.

Again, and you don't wanna go to the movies. You wanna just stay home and read a book. Perhaps you don't wanna go to karaoke and people lies and socialize. You just wanna be on your own. Sometimes you don't wanna do the dishes. Sometimes you have to, sometimes you don't feel like doing something, and that is okay too.

You cannot be on operation mode all the. Yes, I do believe in personal responsibility and having a clean household. However, the point is that the word no is critical and because that is so hard for some people, of which I was one of, I tried to flip it mentally. I may be saying no to that dinner, but I'm really.

Saying yes to whatever else I'm trying to do, which may be time with my child, which may be time independently, which may be time doing something that I really value, that I don't have hours and hours to do, and that's super important for me that week. I'm not saying, no, because I don't wanna be a, you know, a helpful coworker when it's time to volunteer for extra shifts.

I'm saying yes to sleep. I'm saying yes to relaxing my body and my mind so that I can be more productive and more valuable the next day. I'm saying no to things that are not of critical value at that moment, meaning I'm saying yes to the things that are number two. I like this one because in one of my courses of which I have taken many, I'm all about learning.

We had this assignment and I, it was not my favorite assignment. It's where you write down 75 things that you're good at. Or proud of. And when you write them down, you're supposed to write them down one right after the other. Number one, number two, number three, da, da or type them, whatever. Just this power writing where you're not giving this opportunity to yourself to really think too hard.

You're just going after it and you know it gets harder after number 25, number 30. It really does because so many of us are not used to looking at ourselves in this. And what is great about this exercise is you get to see your accomplishments that you really appreciate about yourself, that you probably didn't know.

Your personality traits, what experiences and opportunities you have. You have them all completed right there on paper or computer right there in front of you, that you are part of this, that you did that, that you impacted something. That itself. When you can see it that way, when it's all together, just like your, your taxes, it can be overwhelming When it's all together, what you owe, what you've done that's great for yourself and and for other people.

How you have had a legacy on this planet that also feels really great and overwhelming. And so I love number two and number three kind of may be odd, but listen to your. And this was in one of the articles that I really liked. It's how many times do you just know when you end up in the wrong line at the store?

You knew that was not the right line. You knew you should have been in the left one, but you didn't pick it. Or you knew on your way home you should have gone the other way. You didn't even have to listen to the news, like you just knew that that was not what you should have been. So those are just examples of when your body was in sync with what's really going on around you and you negated it.

So when you start to listen to your gut, you're listening to your intuition, you're listening to the person that you should have, the fider, the trust in that one person. More than anything you need to not let you down on, right? And so in listening to your gut, you're realizing what you already knew. It was in there.

It is in there. And that builds a bigger relationship of trust between you and you and what greater relationship is there. So, Back to change your story, change your life. I appreciate your time today in listening and if you liked it. You can go ahead forward it to someone else that you think that might benefit from it only if you think they would benefit, and I appreciate any feedback from you.

I have the articles that I looked up and researched some of this down below. Check it out just for your own education and own knowledge. I will see you next Tuesday when the next episode drops and let's keep building one another up!